An Open Letter To My Younger Self

Dear younger self,

Please know that the confusion consuming you right now will not last forever. One day, it will all be crystal clear. Check-in with yourself. Get in the habit of asking yourself how you feel and what it is that you actually want. Your desires are valid and they matter. Find peace in the fact that what you don’t yet know will eventually be what sets you free. Free from the people who try to tell you who you should be, free from the expectations of others, free from society saying what is an acceptable life.

Dear younger self,

You are far more capable than you’ve been made to believe. And yet, there is a tiny part of you that knows this. That seed will grow. Water it. I’ve noticed you’ve been talking less lately and listening more. Finding a balance between creating and consuming will be like second nature one day. Your voice has power but right now you’re not using it out of fear of saying the wrong thing. Instead, you are saying what you think others want to hear. And, you’re good at it. At playing the part. At being what others expect of you.

Remember that you don’t have to fit this mold that has been laid out before you. For years you will struggle internally with what you feel is right and what others are telling you is wrong. But, there will come a day when you realize that you don’t need to be “good enough” for everyone else. You just need to be good enough for yourself. You will learn that it’s okay to disappoint another person in order to be true to yourself and not betray your own soul.

The years you have spent depending on the approval and acceptance of other people will fade away. You will feel like you wasted so much of your life. But you didn’t. It was all apart of the process. You will no longer let the insecurities of others make you feel small. You will learn that labels are not your identity. And, you will stop relying on other people to determine your worth because you will learn the hard way that they will not raise your price. Eventually, you will eventually know your value. You will know your own worth. You will know that you are already enough. Step into that. Stand in that truth. That person you’ve been searching for is already inside of you. Remember that.

Dear younger self,

Spend time alone. It will empower you and remind you of the truth of who you are. Love. Consciousness. A fragment of cosmic stardust. A tiny but essential piece of a puzzle that we haven’t quite seen the bigger picture of yet. You know who you are, but right now, you are allowing your identity to become so intertwined with what everyone else thinks you should be. Right now, you may not believe that you’re good enough on your own. But, you are. There will come a day when you stop suppressing your true self. You will recognize your innate worth. And, because of that, you will see the intrinsic value in everyone else around you.

Dear younger self,

You do a good job of accepting those that are different than you. Don’t let other people make you jaded or closed-minded. Remember that accepting someone as they are, does not mean you approve of their mindset, their actions, or the decisions they make. Acceptance simply brings you peace. It’s amazing that you’re passionate about the injustices in this world. But, don’t let what you stand against define you. Remind yourself what it is that you stand for. That is where true happiness lies.

Dear younger self,

I know this world can feel dark at times. Choose to find the light anyway. Remember that we all have a choice in this world. We can choose to let our hearts be filled with anger and bitterness or love and compassion. Choose love. Not because everyone you encounter will deserve it. But, because love will become a defining term that resonates with your soul. Love always wins. You will learn that resentment does not benefit you. Stop waiting for other people to validate your pain. You’re giving your power away. They won’t always understand. There will be many people who don’t believe in you. Continue to believe in yourself anyway.

One day, you will learn that it’s possible to fail at something you don’t like at all. So, you might as well try doing what it is that you love. Many people will be curious about your life. But, only a few will actually care. It will take discernment to know the difference. But, eventually, it will become clear. There will be people in your life who see the best in you when you are feeling your lowest. Remember them. There will be times when you feel like you can accomplish anything and then moments where you feel overwhelmed by every commitment. Embrace both. They will balance you out perfectly.

Dear younger self,

Soon you will learn what it means to be unapologetically yourself in a world that constantly tries to make you something else. You will learn what it looks like to stand in your truth, knowing that others will disagree. One day, you will begin quieting the noise around you so that your inner voice can finally take the stage. You will come to know yourself so well that the misconceptions others make have little to no effect on you. One day, you will finally give yourself permission to let go. You will release all the things that were holding onto you but did not serve you. You will begin loving yourself and the decisions you make so much that the approval of other people won’t matter.

One day, you won’t let the external world have so much power over your internal happiness and wellbeing. You will understand that you have more control over your life than you think you do. We live in a world that fears vulnerability because we’ve all become too familiar with the pain of rejection. We put on a mask, as a defense mechanism, believing that if we show others a version of ourselves, but not who we really are, then we will be protecting ourselves. You, too, will try to wear labels as your identity and keep others at a comfortable distance. But, you will learn that you hate feeling misunderstood. We all desperately want others to recognize us for who we are. But, if we are constantly hiding who that person is, we may lose sight of them ourselves.

Dear younger self,

Transparency is not your enemy. You will come to learn that being recognized for who you are demands authenticity. You desire genuine human connections and that requires vulnerability, which is scary, but so necessary. The truth is, people are going to judge, misunderstand, and reject you no matter what. Whether it’s a version of you, the real you, or some mixture. So, ask yourself how you want to show up in the world and start being that person.

Continue to be inspired by this world around you. Remain fascinated by the intricate dance that occurs when we try to make sense of something that feels so much bigger than ourselves. This world has a habit of making us feel small. We are told that we are no more than a single drop in the ocean or a tiny grain of sand. But, one day you will come to understand the beauty of your place in this world. Sometimes you will forget about the impermanence of everything around you. Remember that there will only ever be one you. No one else will see the world through your lens. That is where your power lies.

Dear younger self,

You don’t need to look towards the external world in order to find inner peace. The truth is, it will be easy to feel alone in this big world. But, you will learn to sit with yourself and enjoy the company that you keep. Stop worrying about being misunderstood and focus on understanding yourself better. Showing your true self to others will get easier. There is so much power in knowing who you are, loving yourself, and sharing that with the world.  Choose to live with intention.

Dear younger self,

I know you think everything happens for a reason. But, remember that it’s okay to feel like some things just happen. Even if it means it’s up to you to make sense of it all. Continue to embrace all of your emotions. You will eventually find a way to turn the things that cause you pain into purpose and create something beautiful out of this life that you’ve been given. Human existence is a miracle in itself. Keep a soft spot in your heart for all of humanity. We are all just trying to do our best to survive. It’s okay to give yourself a break: to recognize that life is crazy a journey. Allow yourself to remain open to the world around you, instead of shriveled up out of fear of further pain.

Dear younger self,

Remember that it’s okay to not have all the answers. It took me years to figure all of this out. You have such a long way to go. But, every step along the way will lead you closer to these truths I’m sharing with you now. If you ever need a reminder, come back to this post. Read it again. Take a breath. Look in the mirror. Love yourself. And, shine bright. One day, you will unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.